Friday, November 17, 2006

Average Mom

Buttons and I met up with some friends at the local mall to play on the indoor playground. I noticed a rambunctious 4 year old boy who was having a great deal of fun and I looked around to find his mom in order to give her a smile. We chatted for a few minutes about naps, bedtime, how great the little play area is, how the kids grow up so fast and then it was time for the boy and his mother to go home. A pleasant, everyday conversation between mothers. The amazing part? I'm pretty certain her son was born in Guatemala and was adopted and I'm sure she surmised the same about Buttons and China. Neither of us discussed adoption. It just never came into the conversation. When she left, I realized how much adoption comes up in conversation with the people I meet who have either adopted, know someone who has adopted or wonders about our adoption. Most of the time, it's ok. Adoption has been one of the absolute best things I've ever done in my life. (The other thing that ranks right up there is marrying my hubby.) I feel...I don't know... a responsibility to educate or at the very least be a positive reflection on the awesomeness of adoption. So when this conversation, as lovely and important as it was, never went to the big "A", I was relieved. Why? Maybe it's because at home I always feel just like other moms. When we're in public together a vibe of "different" is sent from other people. I'm ok with different. No. Really. I am. However, "average mom" seems to be a rare label that I enjoy wearing in public sometimes.

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At November 17, 2006 at 9:11 PM, Blogger Tammy said...

Stephanie & I talked about the "standing out" thing last weekend. Sometimes, it sure is nice to just blend in.

I agree with you, it is soooo important to always shine a positive light on adoption - it is a wonderful way to build a family. BUT, sometimes the questions get old and I don't feel like talking about 'where my daughter is from' when I'm just out doing 'average mom' stuff.

As strange as is sounds, sometimes I'm taken by surprise and wonder how other people know. Crazy huh? Doesn't Allie look like me? She laughs and acts like me, that's for sure.

Anyhoo, I'm glad you had that nice conversation with another 'average mom' - she was probably relieved too.

Take care!

At November 18, 2006 at 1:41 AM, Blogger wzgirl said...

You go - you a-AMom. Or is is a-a-mom? Your encounter today must have been so very refreshing. Have you read the Anne Tyler book, Digging to America, yet? What Tammy wrote above reminded me of some of what is looked at in that novel...the wanting to fit in. And, then the struggle with wanting to be different. I loved it, BTW.


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